The final assignment: Seven Days. The project is hugely open-ended. It is recommended that I start by writing myself a brief. I must outline my chosen context, selecting the format, media and methods; considering whether the illustration will be objective or subjective, and determining the intended audience. The only requirement: the result relates somehow to the title. The project provides an opportunity to show the extent of my new-found skills and talents, utilising techniques that I have learnt over the past year.
Initial Ideas
I read the assignment before starting ‘Part 5’ exercises, many months ago. Since then, I’ve been considering my options; mentally generating ideas, or asking family and friends for their interpretations. Admittedly, I should have created a mind-map at this point, adding to it whenever I had new ideas. Instead, I’d jot them down in the ‘notes’ app on my phone (or voice them through the ‘voice memos’ app). Mostly, I thought through the concepts in my head; fairly quickly reaching a final decision.
Perhaps I could have explored growth and decay in flowers, plants or food, objectively recording how they change over seven days. Setting up a still life and making a new illustration every day; taking photographs and analysing the process – even writing about how the changes make me feel. Perhaps I could have comparatively drawn a withering rose alongside a blooming one, for example. This idea was quite appealing to me; I quite enjoy contradicting subject matter. The contrast between life and death, blossoming and decaying. I could have created 7 separate prints or displayed the work within a short book.
Another idea: recording the life cycle of a bug with the life expectancy of seven days; or at least the start or finish of their lives if they live slightly longer. From the minimal amount of research that I have done, I have found a few bugs that can have such a short life-expectancy. For example, the beautiful luna moth, living for about one week. This bug would be a delight to illustrate.
Alternatively, I could have created 14 comparative illustrations, set over seven days. Writing a story to outline the instincts and motives from the perspective of two opposingly-aged animals, from their perspective. It would be interesting to think about how their motivations change; the story could be about purpose. These ideas would require a considerable amount of research to be accurate and prevent the spread of misinformation. Although I am fascinated by animals and nature, I don’t think it’s my area of expertise. The project wouldn’t reveal my true interests, nor display my full potential.
Another idea would portray seven days of my life; either picking out and illustrating 7 separate, yet significant dates, or depicting seven consecutive days. This would have the most unique result; after all, no two people possess the same experiences. I’m quite a sentimental, reflective person; one who takes many photographs and notes. The project would reflect upon identity, exploring the idea that we are the product of our past. This idea was discredited as I knew choosing seven dates from my life may prove challenging. I hadn’t concluded how I might illustrate life-events; after all, a photograph would surely prove far more useful when objectively portraying an event. Moreover, I didn’t believe the project would be overly appealing to others. Perhaps with uniquely written perspectives and visually attractive illustrations, it could have been; but, I deemed it too ambitious.
Influenced by my previous idea, my chosen project will illustrate seven dates selected from my journal; the diary I have used to record my mental health issues and worries. A subject that I care deeply about and have many entries discussing. Perhaps my illustrations will improve my symptoms; being able to analyse them, reducing them to a thoughtful metaphor. I’ve been told that it can be difficult to understand mental health issues when you haven’t experienced them personally. I’d like to create something that can be used to educate and explain. Moreover, I like the idea that my work could make others feel less alone; connecting to those with similar issues. A positive outcome from a negative situation.
My Brief
I must select and refine seven journal entries, choosing notes that are concise and helpful, avoiding those that are overly personal. I must visually brainstorm my ideas, considering how to combine imagery with text; creating and selecting thumbnails. At this stage, I should refer back to past exercises, particularly ‘Editorial Illustration‘ and ‘Visual Metaphor.’ Once I have identified the subject matter and composition of each illustration, I will search for reference images, materials and colours; creating mood-boards to influence my process. I will also start to consider which fonts I’d like to use and how I’d like to apply them; referring back to exercise ‘Text and Image.’ I will make visuals, outlining each illustration and planning where the text will be positioned. I will then create the final artwork and apply text before printing additional copies of my piece.
I’d like to create a zine. A zine, as stated by Wikipedia, “(short for magazine or fanzine) is a small-circulation self-published work of original or appropriated texts and images, usually reproduced via photocopier. Zines are the product of either a single person or of a very small group, and are popularly photocopied into physical prints for circulation” (Fig. 1. En.wikipedia.org, 2019). There are few rules to zines; they can have any amount of pages, and touch upon whatever you want. Due to the open-ended nature of zines, people create all sorts of sizes; however, most commonly, zines comprise of folded sheets of A4 paper – so, they’re A5. Because I have an A4 printer, I will create something that is A5 or smaller: no less than 4 sides per sheet. This format feels like the perfect authorial practice for this project; small-scale, home-made and open-ended.
After reviewing past projects, I’ve recognised methods and media that I’d like to use; considering styles that would best suit the project while showing off my abilities. The pieces I am most proud of visually include those created during ‘Image Development,’ ‘Assignment Three: a Poster‘ and ‘Identifying Tools and Mediums.’ For each of these pieces, I layered cut-out pieces of textured or patterned paper, before drawing details over the collaged materials. Over the past year, I’ve also picked up digital techniques. Before printing the zines, I will likely add extra digital details, touching up flawed areas.
Image Development 
Assignment Three: A Poster 
Identifying Tools and Mediums
The illustrations will be subjective; I will use metaphors to describe my thoughts and feelings. The piece will have an adult audience. I think young adults will find it most interesting; it seems mental health is more openly discussed among the younger generations.
Choosing Content & Generating Ideas
31/08/2019 Globus Pharyngis
The frog in your throat that would often hop away at the sight of tears, break free at the taste of menthol, has instead settled in; made itself a home. Occupying space for months on end; seemingly taking occasionally holidays, only to eventually return home. The frog’s habitat; quivering and trembling. Frequent earthquakes. A feeling of swollenness in the throat. Deep breathes, sifting through the frog’s home: a filter which ensues breathlessness. When he sleeps, the house fades into the night; rest is the only antidote for relief.
A sensation that for me, will last months at a time; the condition doesn’t affect the swallowing of food or drink, but it is irritating, especially when talking or singing. When the feeling first occurred, I thought I had a cold; when it lasted weeks, I got concerned. The doctor checked for redness or swollenness in my throat and found nothing. I was glad to hear that there was nothing genuinely wrong. But, I was left puzzled. Day to day life became quite frustrating. I eventually realised it was the result of stress. I believe it to be ‘Globus Pharyngis,’ or ‘Globus Sensation’ – the long-lasting feeling of having a lump in your throat. The symptom can be caused by anxiety disorders or depression. There is no direct remedy, however, dealing with the causes is thought to help.
The concept of having a “frog in your throat” will ideally help others to empathise; it’s a phrase that many are familiar with, and a symptom we’ve all felt at some point. The sensation of having a lump in your throat can come when you need to cry, or when you are ill; Globus Pharyngis is a similar feeling. Ironically, the phrase derived from a lozenge product, claiming that ‘a frog in our throat will cure hoarseness.’ Perhaps the origin provides a positive outlook: knowing the sensation can be cured eventually and is not overly serious.
I chose to title the piece ‘Globus Pharyngis:’ the name of the phenomenon. The on-the-nose heading could potentially spread awareness about the strange feeling. Moreover, perhaps it would be helpful for other sufferers to know the name of the sensation; it could ease their anxieties about it. My chosen idea shows an x-ray of my character screaming; the frog jumping away as if the character has taken back control. The pose indicates frustration and difficulty, screaming at the discomfort.
Fig. 6. Frösche in Bauch—ünd Rückenlage 
Fig. 7. Normal flexed neck, X-ray – stock photo 
Fig. 8. Scream X-Ray GIF 
Fig. 9. Jumping frog against white background, close-up – stock photo 
Fig. 10. Normal Lateral Skull Radiograph 
Using the internet, I found an array of X-ray images, as well as a picture of a frog, to inform my drawings. I invited a friend to pose for some photos, asking her to look as though she is angrily screaming.
04/10/2019 Vulnerable
Vulnerability: a fear of exposing your imperfections in a world captivated by flawlessness. Putting your heart on the line for everyone to judge and pull apart. Concerned that your authentic self may be misconstrued; the complexity of your soul overlooked. A suspicion that your name will become synonymous with terms: ‘weak,’ ‘dramatic,’ or ‘pessimistic.’
Many people may avoid talking about their issues for fear of being vulnerable. Feeling exposed. As if they’re showing a sensitive side to themselves; letting their guard down. Others may fear that speaking about their feelings then brings the issues into reality. Some are afraid of being labelled by their suffering; concerned that false assumptions may be put upon them.
Moreover, there have been stigmas attached to mental illnesses for centuries. Thankfully the stigmas are dying out, but they still exist. Telling someone who perhaps doesn’t understand from a place of empathy and experience can cause more problems: feeling like an outcast or alien. After all, it’s only human to want to be loved and understood.
I believe speaking up is not only incredibly beneficial to your mental health, but it’s also courageous. Furthermore, it helps others to understand, helping to break the stigmas. It took me a long time to speak about my issues. I think initially, it didn’t even cross my mind to do so. I didn’t understand the feelings enough to put them into words. Consuming art that deals with the subject, as well as attending therapy, has helped me to voice the emotions. A zine such as this one could do the same for others.
When writing this entry, I was analysing why I feel so vulnerable when speaking about my issues, or even being myself; so, suitably, I titled this piece ‘Vulnerable.’ Taking the phrase ‘putting your heart on the line’ quite literally, my chosen idea exhibits a heart and soul (brain) on a washing line, surrounded by hungry, judgemental birds.
Fig. 11. A Group of Feeding Vultures 
Fig. 12. A Black Vulture in Flight 
Fig. 13. Eastern Turkey Vulture in flight, Canada 
Fig. 14. Tinks the American Black Vulture 
Fig. 15. Vultures of the World 
Fig. 16. Vulture, Black 
Fig. 17. White Wing Tips of the Black Vulture 
Fig. 18. American Black Vulture 
Fig. 19. Illustration of the Human Heart Anatomy 
Fig. 20. Illustration of the Human Brain
When finding reference pictures, I searched for images of vultures, specifically black vultures. Their colossal, threatening appearance suits the subject matter of my piece. Moreover, they are a bird of prey; they scavenge meat from already dead animals.
Perhaps their image as a ruthless, death-related creature is far from the truth; they are an essential part of our eco-system. Vultures act as a natural cleanser, disposing of dead animals to prevent diseases from spreading. Ultimately, they are not trying to be malicious or disgusting; they are simply playing an essential role by following their instincts.
Similarly, judgements from others may appear formidable, but they are not going to kill you. They must exist and be spoken for the stigmas and ignorance to be exposed and therefore corrected. Perhaps also a cleansing turn of events.
I found several images of vultures, observing them from all angles. My idea is to include a flock of vultures, flying in from every direction. I also found two illustrations: a heart and a brain, to further aid my drawings.
09/08/2019 Headache
What happens when that same brain that controls your arms, your legs, your organs, becomes distorted? Doubt that manifests itself through physical forms: mental demons which command your every function. Pain that forces you to distrust your body; an ongoing internal interrogation: “Am I dying or going insane; is there something wrong with my body or my mind?” Vicious and exhausting cycles: anxiety-causing pain, pain-causing anxiety.
It’s a fair assumption that mental health issues isolate themselves entirely to the brain. But, when you realise that it’s the brain that sends the orders, it makes sense that an unwell mind may cause physical symptoms too. When you feel fear, the fight or flight response kicks in. What happens when you can’t run, nor fight in everyday situations? You freeze; your muscles become tense. When that anxiety is constant, the muscles spend long hours tensed, causing aches and pains all over the body.
I’ve found myself worrying about these aches over the years. Thinking exactly what I wrote in the extract: ‘Am I dying or going mad?’ They can be so intense that it’s difficult to believe that the cause could simply be stress. I’ve attended many doctor’s offices complaining about headaches, chest pains, leg and throat aches, and lethargy, only to hear the same response: it’s caused by your mental health.
I chose to title this page ‘Headache;’ I’ve experienced headaches and migraines frequently for years. There is no cause for them, except stress, tension and fatigue. As well as being one physical symptom of mental health issues, the word also acts as a metaphor: aches and pains caused by what’s happening inside the head.
Due to the frequency and unpredictability of these issues, it can feel as though they are controlling you; getting in the way of day-to-day life. My chosen idea shows a puppet in a distorted, face-covering position. The characters own, mysterious hands are controlling them. The idea that your own body caused the pains; a strange catch-22 situation whereby to get better, you need to fight against yourself. The remedy of frequent headaches: go on with life in spite of them. Do things outside of your comfort zone that may cause the pain. Take back control, after all, they’re your hands.
Fig. 21. Puppet Strings 
Fig. 22. Puppet Strings 
Fig. 23. Puppet Strings 
When searching for reference images, I found Fig. 21-23. Puppet Strings. Ceramic, life-sized puppets by Hijiri Yahagi. I was amazed to find something so similar to my idea. The sculptures show how to divide the limbs in order to illustrate my planned pose. They are very clearly puppets, yet their realistic proportions make them look natural and life-like. I enjoy the cracked glaze finish that Yahagi has applied; it adds to their solemn, broken expressions. It’s also interesting to see where and how strings were attached.
I also proceeded to take pictures of my friend, asking her to pose in a tense, puppet-like way. I wanted the character to have an arm covering her face as if she is holding her head in pain. I also took webcam photos of my hands, posing in an intimidating, out-stretched manner, ready for the strings to be attached.
07/08/2019 Perspective
If two brains were to trade – exchange experiences, knowledge, and perspective – would they reach enlightenment? Would the immediate rush of knowledge show signs of genius? Or would the inevitable contradictions spark a breakdown; madness provoked by the tugging and pulling of differing ideas? Could underlying trauma cause their eyes to widen; triggering brand-new tears to fall, despite only experiencing it through memory? Would they gain a new perspective, or stubbornly hold tightly onto their own? Could the switch induce a heightened sense of empathy; a new understanding of our human-peers?
Perhaps an odd extract. Analysing empathy and sympathy. The paragraph recognises that every person could react differently to the same story; empathy is influenced by your own experiences. Ultimately, the message here is the importance of sharing thoughts and opinions. Everyone will react differently, but our unique stories spread compassion and insight, helping us to understand the human condition. The paragraph holds many rhetorical questions; after all, it’s impossible to answer any of the questions with blanket statements.
The next entry will be titled ‘Perspective.’ The note explores how trading our perspectives and thoughts could make us feel. My chosen idea shows several people with tiny ponds inside their heads, fish jumping from pond to pond. Having an open mind to all views: knowing full well that some fish may not survive within your pond, but understanding that that is perfectly fine; the fish can jump out when they please.
I’ve always liked the idea that fishtanks are like miniature eco-systems; you can only buy certain fish depending on what fish you already own. The fish and plants make themselves at home, ideally growing harmoniously alongside each other. Much like our brains, the tanks need care and cleaning; they can only hold so many fish, i.e., information. Certain fish will benefit the tank, while others may not; it’s a case of understanding that the worst fish don’t have to occupy the entire tank. The harmful ones could even move back into their original home; somewhere they’d surely be far happier. The metaphor works well for my journal entry and could be very interesting to the eye.
Fig. 24. Golden Fish 
Fig. 25. Fish Jumping 
Fig. 26. Siamese Fighting Fish 
When finding reference images, I looked for several types of fish, especially, ones that I find visually appealing. I also found one photo of a fish jumping out of the water; to observe how the water splashes and ripples behind them. Some of the images come from botanical gardens that I have visited, displaying goldfish and koi. These fish are common in outdoor ponds, whereas something like a (Fig. 26) Siamese Fighting Fish requires a warm environment. As far as I’m aware, Fig. 24. Golden fish needs cold water, but wouldn’t necessarily survive well in a pond. I also took photographs of my friend, asking her to face several directions.
14/08/2019 Comfort in the Panic
There’s a beauty in the gloom; an addictive nature to the numbness. When anxious thoughts have occupied your mind and soul ceaselessly, the concept of killing them feels wrong; as if you’re destroying a part of your identity. The romanticisation of depression; a strange, contradicting feeling. A unique form of groundedness; hyper-aware of the blood passing through the veins, the weight of objects as you pick them up, each and every heartbeat. A deafening lack of energy, dialled up; exceeding the limits of lethargy.
I do believe that depression has an almost addictive nature. Your surroundings have a new appreciation. Your bed becomes more comfortable; distracting yourself becomes incredibly pleasant. The world slows down a little bit. Stress is eliminated when nothing feels as though it is relevant anymore. I remember this original thought from many years ago; sitting on the school bus feeling incredibly low, but realising ‘I’m strangely comfortable in this feeling. The padded seat is warm, helping me through this feeling.’ The world slowed down; I started to see the trees pass by in a different colour. Existing in my own bubble.
There are a few songs that made me realise that this sensation is not only experienced by myself, influencing my extract. One being Fig. 2. ‘Heavy’ by Linkin Park: “I want to let go, but there’s comfort in the panic.” Fig. 3. ‘Change’ by NF: “I don’t do drugs, I’m addicted to the pain though. I’ve been on it for a while, don’t know how to put it down. Gotta have it, its a habit I’ma break though.” Both artist’s talk of the subject as if its an addiction.
Another song, Fig. 4. ‘Doomed’ by Bring Me the Horizon: “And when it rains, it pours, but I think I like it – and you know that I’m in love with the pain.” I must have listened to this song a thousand times; its been on repeat for years. In the track by track commentary, the singer said “Rather than trying to fight these demons, I should embrace them. I guess it’s me realizing that I secretly enjoy this [?]. I think I secretly find depression romantic, and sometimes I just like to let it take over me. It’s almost like a euphoric sadness – it cleanses your mind if you just let it happen” (Fig. 5. Sykes, 2015). This extract brings almost a positive outlook to the illness. Learning to embrace the feeling will take back your control; if you can learn to cope with depression, you can do anything.
What’s interesting is that each these unique artists are incredibly outspoken about mental health, yet they all developed this same attitude. It’s reassuring to know that the feeling is commonly felt by those with depression; it isn’t wrong or abnormal.
I chose to title this piece ‘Comfort in the Panic;’ in honour to the late Chester Bennington and a nod to his song (Fig. 2) Heavy. I think it’s quite a poetic way to word the feeling. My chosen idea will fill the page with greens and reds; my character will be bathing in a pond of her own tears. Surrounding her will be beautiful pond-related plants and fish. The illustration will show how the sensation can be quite comforting; surrounded by the beauty of nature. The character looks relaxed; she has allowed the sadness to exist, and it has created something oddly beautiful.
The piece will relate to the previous entry: ‘Perspective.’ If our heads are ponds of fish, then she is quite literally ‘inside her head;’ letting her feelings grow until they encompass her. Whether that is beneficial or dangerous, I don’t know.
Fig. 27. Below 
Fig. 28. Secret Garden
Once again, I looked through my photographs, revisiting images from botanical garden visits. I also sourced images of people submerged underwater. I was interested to see how the water surrounds the contours of the face; how it glistens and ripples. I also dug up some images of my friend, taken a few years ago for a different project. I want my character’s hair to float in the water; I think it would look interesting.
17/09/2019 Plans
Assigning activities to a divided time slot. Precise time management relying heavily on dedication, motivation, resilience. Plans never consider the mornings, spent staring at the bedroom ceiling. The overwhelming cravings for procrastination. The unpredictable rise of fear and panic; speeding heartbeats, shaken hands, rolling stomachs. The unexpected tears. Fluctuating beliefs; bouncing between doubt and optimism.
One of the most frustrating things about mental health issues is the unpredictability; you never know how you may feel one day to the next. When trying to make plans, its always in the back of your head. As someone who experiences panic attacks quite often, particularly in public, I will worry that I will ruin the occasion for myself and for others. Even when trying to manage my time, balancing errands, chores, and coursework, I find it difficult to find the motivation and passion when it comes to actually go through with the plans. I feel this issue can be overlooked. Some may suggest schedules and strictness; however, the problem can be finding the motivation and purpose to execute those things in the first place.
This journal entry was born from frustration at the unpredictability of my issues; how making plans seems impossible because I can never predict how I may feel in advance. Suitably, I titled the piece ‘Plans.’ The concept of my illustration: locked inside a washing machine are the organs most affected by anxiety. When the washing machine is turned off, they are still, calm and comfortable. However, it is set to turn itself on ‘whenever, forever.’ When it’s on, the organs are rapidly spinning, bouncing from wall to wall. The brain is overthinking, spiralling. The heart is speeding: beating fast. The stomach is churning itself up, causing cramps and tummy aches. You can imagine that once that washing machine has itself turned off, the organs are exhausted and fatigued, feeling battered and abused. Perhaps they are then cleansed, forced to appreciate calm and composure.
Fig. 19. Illustration of the Human Heart Anatomy 
Fig. 20. Illustration of the Human Brain 
Fig. 29. Illustration of a stomach – stock illustration 
Fig. 30. Untitled 
Fig. 31. Untitled 
Fig. 32. Untitled
I included the same illustrations of a heart and a brain, sourced for a previous entry: ‘Vulnerable.’ I like the idea of adding neon signage within my piece; they are so striking and prominent, much like negative thoughts can be. I also found images of washing machines; to fill the horizontal space, I’d like to include several washing machines side-by-side, like a dry-cleaner. After all, plans are often public, and these feelings are far less debilitating when they present themselves in the comfort of my own home.
19/09/2019 Euphoric Sadness
The lottery doesn’t come with a happiness guarantee. Material objects won’t fix your issues. Perhaps they’ll provide temporary comfort, but once the excitement has settled in, you’re left wanting more: addicted to the feeling. Setting new goals to chase the same sensations. Materialism should be an add-on; an extra addition to life; not something to rely on. Careers, peers and experiences won’t satisfy you unless you are happy in yourself. Instead, prioritise optimism, passion and gratefulness. Be comfortable with the uncomfortable; embrace every emotion.
I think many of us hold our worth in our possessions and surroundings; forgetting that even living in the best situation won’t mean anything if you cannot be happy. You could buy a mansion or a private jet, but once you’ve lived in that mansion for years, or flown by private jet hundreds of times, you will grow used to that convenience. It won’t solve your problems. This extract relates back to ‘3/10/2019,’ in that we are always searching for change and improvement. However, to be happy in each passing moment will lead to the most joyful life. To be comfortable with feelings of sadness or anger, realising these feelings are simply human, will lead to contentment.
This entry will be titled ‘Euphoric Sadness,’ again inspired by a musician (see Fig. 5. Sykes, 2015). The title contradicts itself, much like the journal note, it pushes the notion of being comfortable with the uncomfortable. My chosen idea shows my character dancing with herself: one version of her is happy; the other is sad. The idea that you can’t have one emotion without the other – one person can’t dance without their partner. The piece will influence others to embrace and express themselves, despite (or because of) any emotion.
Fig. 33. Ritmo Flamenco 
Fig. 34. Flamenco Vivo Carlota Santana 
Fig. 35. Flamenco Dancer 
Fig. 36. Flamenco Dancer
I chose flamenco dancing after being inspired by the flowing, colourful dresses occasionally worn by the dancers. I proceeded to do a small amount of research about the dance, learning that both dancer and musician always improvise. Both artists exchange a dialogue; specific steps and melodies indicate the next move. The ever-evolving language represents the interpretation of life; many refer to the dance as a form of living art.
The beauty and authenticity of the dance makes it the perfect influence for my art. My piece will encourage the idea of being in perfect harmony with yourself and your emotions; expressing and embracing every part of you.
It seems that traditionally, the dancer performs solo; there are instances where the dance is performed in groups. However, I am unclear as to whether group dances are choreographed. Either way, my idea shows the same character dancing alongside herself. Perhaps it is a solo performance after all?
03/10/2019 Overthinking
Scrambling the floor searching for a cause; seeking an excuse for your negativity. Reexamining events from 10 years ago, wondering if they are the origin of your current internal drama. Believing the endless mental tragedy will never be solved, yet optimistically scheming potential solutions. Striving for nonsensical, overly-ambitious changes; ones which can prove self-destructive; captivated by isolation, enticed by surrender. Tempted by a drastic transformation in a desperate attempt to also transform the mind. Running with the doubts tied around the ankle.
I think this is a perspective that is not often discussed: the anxiety being the cause of overthinking. When these fearful feelings come about with little reason, searching for an explanation or solution: ‘Maybe it was this event from my childhood? Maybe it was that thing I said three days ago? Perhaps I’ll feel less guilty for being negative if I cut this person off entirely?’
Something I will do when I’m unhappy: I will devise life changes in my head; overwhelming myself further with ambitious ideas, many outside of my comfort zone. It’s quite the vicious cycle; one which causes profound confusion. The stress of overthinking and overly-ambitious planning, often causing more anxiety.
I titled this page ‘Overthinking.’ My idea will display an infinite maze; my character sat against a wall. The labyrinth could include question-mark-shaped walls, tessellating with each other. The maze represents the twists and turns that thoughts often take, feeling lost, and frantically searching for an exit.
Fig. 37. Maze 
Fig. 38. Surreal Maze 
Fig. 39. Alice in Wonderland 
Fig. 40. Teen girl sitting on the chair holding head and crying 
Fig. 41. Teen girl sitting on the chair in depression and frustration crying
When selecting reference images, I searched for illustrated mazes, interested to see how other artists may have tackled similar subject matters. Fig. 36, by Yukai Du, shows quite a stylised and colourful maze. The walls are straight, coloured with blue, cream and orange; the artist used a simple line pattern to imitate bricks or stones. The walls gradually grow closer together towards the top of the piece, creating an angled, birds-eye perspective.
Guy Billout used a similar technique when creating Fig. 37. The distorted hedges twist and turn in quite an unstable, surreal manner. The artist has used shades of light and dark green to colour the bushes’ two planes, before using a sponge-like brush to add texture.
Fig. 38. shows a scene from the 1951 animated film ‘Alice in Wonderland.’ The labyrinth is incredibly jagged; the disorderly style is puzzling to the eye, perhaps making Alice appear more lost than she truly is. I particularly enjoy the scribbled texture added to the hedges; a simple, yet effective way to illustrate foliage.
Studying examples inspired an idea: giving the maze a brain-like shape and placing the character in the centre. I also found reference images of a girl to inform my drawing.
Additional Notes
You may have realised that there are eight journal entries instead of seven. In fact, initially, there were nine that I picked out. I wanted to give myself plenty of options. If I felt one extract wasn’t as powerful as the rest, or simply didn’t fit in, I could remove it. It puts a little bit less pressure on me to make every idea work.
Organising my Ideas & Rough Visuals
To start this process, I divided an A5 sheet of paper into eight squares. I then assigned the titles and general composition of each entry to their own, individual slip of paper. I proceeded to experiment with the order of each entry, considering where each piece would fit into the narrative. Although this system was rather messy, it served as an excellent, quick way to organise all of the planning I had completed up-to-date.
Next, I created an A6, 18-page booklet and filled it with rough visuals, applying my proposed layout. The finished product will have 14-pages; however, this booklet needed to accommodate one spare idea, so I added a few extra sheets. I’d often create quick, digital drawings before adding the entries to the booklet; this allowed me to practise drawing the forms of my designs, while further establishing my final layout decisions.
The zine commences, with ‘Headache’ on the first page. The message of this entry links to (or perhaps introduces) several others. In placing it first, I have wasted no time in providing a reminder that mental illness can be both controlling and physically painful. The imagery within the zine will get progressively more positive and cheerful; this entry serves as quite a shocking introduction.
Next, I chose ‘Globus Pharyngis.’ This sensation is an example of one physical symptom caused by mental illness; it felt appropriate to place it firmly after ‘Headache.’
Notably, the x-ray imagery has disappeared! While I struggled to fit it onto the page, I realised it wasn’t necessary for this particular design, ultimately deciding not to include it at all.
The following double-page spread will accommodate ‘Plans.’ This entry is another, more in-depth, exploration of the physical symptoms; it delves into how mental illness can affect day-to-day life.
I positioned ‘Overthinking’ on the 4th double-page spread. The idea doesn’t have a strong link to any of the other entries; it seems appropriate to place it in the middle of the zine. After seeing this idea in context with the others, it seems this is the ‘eighth day’ that I can remove. The surreal style stands as the odd-one-out. The jagged shapes are somewhat unnerving in comparison with the other pages.
I placed ‘Vulnerable’ after ‘Plans;’ the two entries relate to each other visually. The narrative is starting to reach a slightly more positive place; the character is beginning to open up and take beneficial risks despite the circumstances. The following three entries have progressively more positive messages.
Next: ‘Comfort in the Panic.’ This entry explores a strange optimism that can come with the territory; one that can have both good and bad consequences. The entry doesn’t connect to the previous entries, nor does it belong at the positive end of the spectrum; it seems logical to place it close to the middle.
Following ‘Comfort in the Panic,’ I chose ‘Perspective.’ Whereas the previous entry pictures the character neck-deep in their feelings, this entry encourages others to share their thoughts and feelings and to keep an open mind when doing so. I used similar visual metaphors to symbolise thoughts, indicating that other people’s ideas can also be comforting.
To conclude my zine, I selected ‘Euphoric Sadness.’ This entry is possibly the most optimistic; it also relates to the previous two designs. The subject matter explores ‘Comfort in the Panic’ in more detail, yet the mirrored imagery compliments ‘Perspective.’
Feedback
It was before completing the ‘Rough Visual’ stage that I received feedback from my tutor. She was pleased with the work I had developed to date, giving some pointers to keep me moving in the right direction. She reminded me to keep my ideas direct and straightforward to prevent losing the message of my entries. When experimenting with style, she suggested I take inspiration from my previous work, while considering what would be most appropriate for this narrative. Concerning the colour palette, she advised me to use a limited range of shades; this will keep the printing cost low. My tutor proposed I experiment with colour digitally, applying several possibilities to my thumbnails. Amongst a few other pointers, she also asked me to consider making my zine from a single sheet of A3 paper; I proceeded to watch 14-page, single-sheet, zine-making tutorials!
My first instinct was to create a 14-page zine, forgetting that I needed a front and back cover. This could have worked if each side displayed an entry. However, all of my designs require a double-page spread. Anyhow, I used a tutorial by @autumnthing on YouTube (see Fig. 42). I started by folding an A3 sheet of paper into sixteen squares, making three cuts, before carefully folding the design back and forth and tucking the end pages behind each other. I used several pieces of double-sided tape to secure the loose edges down, making the booklet a little more sturdy. Using an A3 sheet of paper, this technique would create an A7 sized-zine.
Next, I searched for 16-page single-sheet zine tutorials, following a video by @BlindEyesNight3 on YouTube (see Fig. 43). This method involved a similar technique, cutting and folding in different areas. Similar to my previous booklet, the edges of several pages are detached from each other. Once again, I could use glue or double-sided tape to overcome this issue. However, I am unsure whether I’d want my zine to have this problem. Not only would it take far longer to assemble the zines, the feature might also appear imperfect and unprofessional. Using an A3 sheet of paper, this technique would create an A7 sized-zine.
Another technique, inspired by @DearColleen on Blogger (see Fig. 44), requires you to fold a piece of paper into 8 squares, before stapling the centre pages and cutting around the edges. This technique allows you to print your design on both sides of the page, before assembling the zine with ease. However, due to the nature of the production, some of the edges may be crooked. Using an A3 sheet of paper, this technique would create an A6 sized-zine.
An alternative way to assemble my zine would be to cut four A4 sheets of paper into shape, before stapling them together; slicing each piece individually. Again, this may result in edges that don’t line up perfectly. This would create an A6 sized-zine.
There are pros and cons to each of my zine options. The first option is immediately excluded due to its invalid number of pages. The method by @BlindEyesNight3 (Fig. 43) is a great way to assemble a zine without staples; however, the process is somewhat confusing. The mini-booklet would benefit from glue or tape, which may prove time-consuming. The booklet is small when using an A3 sheet of paper: after cutting and folding, the zine transpired to be A7. At this stage, I’m unsure which size will work best; but this will ultimately be a determining factor. My third option, inspired by @DearColleen (Fig. 44) is an ideal size and may make the printing process a little easier. The edges may be slightly skew-whiff; however, I could use a craft knife/guillotine paper cutter to ensure precision. This process would remove any margins created during the printing process. The last method may be the most time-consuming but may allow for the most customizability.
Style Experimentation
I started this process by making a visual: tracing my rough thumbnail drawing, digitally. This allowed for precision and readjustments. Following my tutor’s advice, I tried to make decisions about my favoured styles, colours and techniques before applying the methods to each of the entries.
The first experiment was very intuitive. I considered using four shades: black, red, yellow and blue. I wondered whether I could layer the colours, inspired by the often blurred edge around projected lights. I thought the combination of colours could be bold and versatile. I disregarded this experiment as it was far too flat and underwhelming. I spent quite some time trying to come up with solutions but ultimately decided to start afresh.
Next, I started considering quite an abstract colour palette: muted, natural shades with a pop of electric coral. Again, I thought the colours could be quite versatile with my designs. The blue has a sombre tone that would compliment the mood of my work.
I was inspired by a risograph print by Natalie Andrewson (see Fig. 45), employing a similar colour scheme. I’ve been intrigued by artwork with pops of neon-like shades; it creates such a unique, almost other-worldly feeling. Thinking back to the ‘Reading an Image’ exercise, I wanted to use a visually dominating colour to draw attention to some of the most significant areas of my drawings.
Using similar colour schemes, I started adding texture to my work. I began scanning various materials, including an ibuprofen manual and some ‘fragile’ tape, before editing and adding them to my work.
I printed a few physical copies, seeing how the designs would look on paper. Once again, I was underwhelmed by my work; the pieces weren’t visually interesting to me. There was too much blank space, and the style didn’t compliment the message.
At this stage, I searched my drawers and cupboards for materials and textures, scanning and editing my findings.
My next two experiments were inspired by a collage by George Douglas: Fig. 46. Collector. Admittedly, I took a lot of inspiration from the colours and textures of this piece, imitating the look quite closely. Had I continued with this style, I would have made some hefty adjustments; perhaps changing the colours and adding more drawn elements. I think at this stage, I wanted to see whether a similar style would be sufficient; however, once again, I felt underwhelmed by the piece.
Realising that I wanted more noise in the background, I tried adding textures behind the two illustrated elements. I employed a simple colour scheme: black, white and red. The shades are dramatic and extremely versatile together. I hope to use the pop of red carefully throughout the zine.
I next attempted a ‘traditional media’ collage. The process required a lot of experimentation. I’d often draw elements over acetate; this allowed me to push them to one side if I didn’t like them. The red ‘squiggles,’ as well as the pictures of an unknown lady, were printed/drawn onto acetate and stuck down using spray mount. I layered coloured paper with black spray paint. Additionally, I made use of an ibuprofen manual; this complimented the subject matter and title.
This style reflects some of my past illustrations. Throughout my OCA journey, I’ve discovered a passion for collage; I’ve learnt a plethora of different techniques, both traditional and digital. The methods I’ve chosen will apply some of the things I’ve learnt within this course. Influenced heavily by ‘Identifying Tools and Mediums,’ as well as many earlier exercises, I’ve learnt to use textures and colours that relate to the subject of my work.
My zine will have a journal-like feel, similar to my ‘Travel Guides‘ idea. The entries were born from scribbles in my notebook; it seems fitting that they are paired with scrapbook-inspired illustrations. I’ve used similar methods within my personal work, too; when creating journal pages, cards and gifts. I feel comfortable and experienced with this technique.
Visuals
Next, I drew visuals for each entry. I scanned my thumbnail sketches into Adobe Illustrator, tracing over them and adjusting any proportions that weren’t quite right. The process took quite a lengthy amount of time; I wanted to ensure the drawings were to my liking.
I decided to re-draw the first design, ‘headache,’ taking inspiration from a different thumbnail sketch. The initial visual didn’t compliment the other entries; the composition was far too boxy and abstract, whereas the others are more straightforward. Although the outcome of this piece differed most to the original thumbnail, each entry underwent a variety of changes and adjustments.
A Change of Mind
Admittedly, I wasn’t 100% happy with my final ‘style experiment,’ as shown above. The collage sat on my shelf for a few weeks while I completed the visuals; I slowly realised it wasn’t ‘the one’.
As I was drawing the visuals, I continued contemplating how I should use colour and texture. I realised green and orange were the perfect colour combination. Not only am I fan of the palette, the colours would also translate well into each of the drawings.
The orange shade would be visually dominant; I could use it to highlight the crucial elements of each piece. My pieces include many nature-inspired details: frogs, leaves and lily pads, for example. Green would suit these areas well. I roughly applied the shades to each piece, considering whether the colour combination was viable.
At this stage, I also decided that my piece would ultimately be digital. After spending so much time drawing the vector visuals, it was far easier to apply colour digitally than to translate the drawings into a hand-made collage.
Applying Texture and Colour
I took some time to ensure each vector could be ‘filled in’ correctly, connecting any loose ends. I applied colour to each section, before adding texture.
Creating Texture
I used black spray paint, spritzing the page lightly to create a grainy, speckled effect. Scanning the piece, I removed the white background with the ‘image trace’ tool, before editing the colours and creating a ‘pattern’ with my new texture.
Additionally, I used a rubber roller to apply green acrylic paint to a sheet of paper, before transferring the page into Adobe Illustrator and repeating a similar technique as above: utilising ‘image trace’ and creating a ‘pattern.’
Fonts
I wanted to continue the journal-inspired theme, as determined in the ‘style experimentation’ stage. I started my ‘font search’ by experimenting with a variety of pens and pencils, writing the same sentence repeatedly. However, I very quickly rejected these options, deciding my handwriting was too inconsistent and may be difficult to read.
Fig. 47. Trust Dog 
Fig. 48. Untitled
I found inspiration from Fig. 47. Trust Dog and Fig. 48. Untitled. To create the text, the artist seemingly prints text onto paper, before cutting and attaching the sentence to their collage. It gives the appearance that the passage was ripped from a book or magazine; creating a very homemade, journal-inspired feeling.
I enjoy the contrast between the white and coloured background; it frames the writing, making it stand out without using bold fonts or colours. I also like the jagged edges around the text-cutting. Again, it feels very homemade. The ‘imperfections’ make the piece feel more genuine and authentic.
I looked online for a similar font, searching for newspaper styles and ransom note-inspired typefaces. Ultimately, I didn’t find what I was looking for. Instead, I decided to experiment with fonts I already had, drawing white boxes manually. I chose a font that I downloaded from the internet: Fig. 49, Impact label. This typeface quickly became one of my favourites after downloading it during a different project, so much so that I purchased a real Dymo label maker! The font is easy to read; the straightforward letters complement the simplistic illustrations. I like that the characters are all uppercase; it adds a sense of harmony and levelness. The label-like style links back to the journal inspired theme.
I also took inspiration from Fig. 50. The writing style is elegant and feminine; it adds an intricate value to the otherwise simple composition. The image encouraged me to do something similar; I decided to write the titles of the entries using my handwriting. I used a drawing tablet, writing directly to Adobe Illustrator; this added a personal touch to my work.
Finished Pieces
When applying the text to my illustrations, I decided to shorten the entries slightly, even re-wording certain parts; this was an attempt to make the entries more concise and readable.
Zine Templates
I started applying the designs to the zine templates (see above: ‘Feedback’). Creating new documents, I positioned the pieces into place. Admittedly, this was a process of trial and error; some entries would print out upside-down or in the wrong place! I investigated three alternative printing methods.
Template inspired by Fig. 43. How To Make A Micro-Mini Zine. The piece is printed, cut and folded in a particular way.
Template inspired by Fig. 44. How to Make a 16 Page Zine from One Sheet of Paper! The piece is printed and folded in a prticular way. Before the north, east and south edges are removed, a staple is added to the centre page.
‘Manual Method:’ This template requires the pages to be cut out individually and stapled at the centre. It uses two sheets of paper when printed double sided.
To halve the pieces, I created two portrait A5 artboards in Adobe Illustrator, placing them together and positioning my artwork on top. I’d then save the artboards individually. I thought this would be the most efficient and consistent way to do this.
At this stage, I also experimented with paper types. My concluding decision: combining brown kraft paper with the final printing method, as labelled the ‘Manual method.’ I also created a version with plain white paper.
This printing technique allows for the most precision and leeway. With the other two methods, I found entries would overlap, or the margins would show unintentionally. Whereas, with the ‘manual method,’ I could line the pages up, or cut off any tricky margins, with ease.
The brown kraft paper gave the illustrations a unique, earthy texture, complementing the often nature-inspired subject matter. Brown paper is also something I associate with journal pages and homemade produce. A roll of brown paper is a common household item. It reminds me of wrapped parcels, envelopes, parchment paper and cardboard boxes; materials someone might use inside a scrapbook.
Finished Piece
I created a small sleeve to wrap around my zine, using the same colours and fonts as are inside. I secured the jacket with a small piece of double-sided tape. I think it adds a professional touch; the zine feels more like a finished product. If I were to continue working on the zine, I would make a design or pattern for the front and back cover, possibly adding the title beneath the sleeve.
Evaluation
This project took a lengthy amount of time; during the process, my zine evolved and changed. I lost certain ideas over time; either forgetting their importance or becoming sidetracked. As I look back on the project, I realise some elements and ideas simply didn’t make the final cut. I should have highlighted some of the most significant plans to keep them at the forefront of my mind.
There are many changes I would make to my zine, both small and large. If I were to repeat this project, I would do more initial research into zine design; selecting styles and mediums before coming up with the ideas. Knowing what techniques I wanted to use may have influenced the composition of my pieces. One of the biggest regrets surrounding my zine is the way the entries fit on the page. Although it was something I considered during the thumbnail process, it could have been more successful. I would be happier with my work if the entries were more detailed and exciting; perhaps adding additional decorative elements.
To improve the quality of my illustrations, I would head back into Adobe Illustrator to make some minor improvements. To the entry titled ‘Plans,’ I would alter the colours of the brain’s ‘details,’ from orange to white; this would translate clearer when printed. I also struggled to include a critical detail: the words ‘whenever, forever.’ Despite my struggle, I would continue trying to find a solution. Perhaps I would have resolved certain issues, had I made more prototype print-outs; this would have allowed me to notice problems at a more convenient time.
When implementing handwritten words across several pages, it was challenging to keep the letters at a consistent height and angle. Especially for myself, considering my style of writing changes from day-to-day. To overcome this, next time, I will use guidelines. To ensure I can effectively compare the different words to one another, I will write the terms in one go, on one document, before transferring them into position.
I had some issues when printing, folding and cutting my zine. For instance, when printing double-sided pages, the two sides would not always line up correctly. If I were to sell my zine, I would investigate printing companies, or attempt to make the process easier and more efficient. One suggestion would be to remove the background colour and widen the bleed.
At the beginning of the project, I highlighted a selection of past works; this was as a reminder of my previous successes. The medium of each example was collage; although my finished illustrations were digital, there are some fundamental similarities. During my time on the course, I’ve found a love for painterly textures, once again applying them to this project. The details within the portrait’s hair, used within my ‘Image Development‘ and ‘Assignment Three: a Poster’ final pieces, also inspired me. It adds a sense of movement and texture.
Despite there being a plethora of adjustments I could make, I am reasonably happy with my final piece. It’s a decent attempt for my very first zine! It was interesting to explore my mental health through this medium; it’s striking just how much my thoughts and feelings have changed since writing the original entries. To some extent, this justifies the title, ‘Seven Days;’ the zine depicts seven, very particular days of my life.
I’m happy with some of the concepts and metaphors that I created, although I will admit that some were more successful than others. My favourite entries, both visually and metaphorically, are the last three: ‘Comfort in the Panic,’ ‘Perspective’ and ‘Euphoric Sadness.’ The pieces are both beautiful and engaging; I think they convey the messages quite well.
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Marianne Williams 
